Two outs, Two strikes, bottom of the ninth!

Posted on October 29, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

Life presents many opportunities. There are some we do not care for, some we try to avoid and then there are others we cannot avoid and MUST address them head on. What do you do in the stressful crunch of life? Do you fold? Do you run? Do sweep your stress, trauma, conflict under the rug? When we are faced with a situation where the epinephrine is free flowing through our body, our heart is racing, perspiration is beading up on our skin like a shower wall mirror, what do we do? There are many responses, and there are times we MUST react. In the 2011 World Series there are life lessons which can be learned. Twice, the St. Louis Cardinals were with one strike away from elimination. They persevered. The old adage, “It is not over till it’s over” never rang so true. I have witnessed this ( NEVER GIVE UP ) attitude in various forms in life. From cancer patients, athletes, psychotherapy patients, veterans of war, and severe life trauma. Some of us have an innate ability to strive and push through all situations and end up surprising ourselves. There is a belief, an attitudinal adjustment that these individuals have which is not so inherent in others. I am of the belief that this “never give up” attitude can be taught, can be instilled. When the attitude is there, the belief is formulated then amazing outcomes occur. The wildlife photographer who obtains great shots has spent thousands of hours in the field, and many many disappointments before that one magical picture comes together. One thing is for sure, one must believe, and get out there to achieve the results.

Negative thinking, negative thoughts WILL give rise to increased chances of failure. This my dear reader is a FACT. I personally believe that most individuals that have the drive to be happy, the drive to push themselves to the limit, and those that are faced with two strikes and two outs in the bottom of the ninth have had some type of severe adversity in their lives. In listening to the interview with David Freese after the Cardinals won the World Series he gave up baseball for a short time. Was done. Maybe frustration, maybe a life trauma, and it does not matter what the adversity was. What does matter, is that something occurred.  I have zero studies to back this up, no chi squares, no p-values and no control groups. I do have life experience and thousands of patients I have treated. Some have made it to the professional ranks, and some are successful defined by being happy as well as having very lucrative careers. All of them do not rattle with one second left as they stand on the free throw line of life. Ice for veins? Maybe? I would rather call it learned confidence. Not arrogance but learned confidence from dealing with severe adversity.

These individuals do not whine and complain. When injured they do not run for attention. They proceed and want to be there when the crisis occurs, when the two outs arrive for they feel they can help the team as well as others. For the most part their is a paradoxical humility. Paradoxical in the sense that they do not strive for the interview, or the television time, however when faced with it, there is genuine humility. Those with unresolved issues who have also suffered life crisis will not want the bat in their hands in the ninth, they will avoid and these are the individuals that hesitate in life not sure of venturing traits like risk, failure, winning, and self introspection. Literally their own fear is their fear. Let me repeat. Their own fear is their fear. It is a perpetuating fear that arises similar to a summer thunderstorm, coming from the West. As quick as it arises it will pass. These individuals cannot handle the rain and thunder and must duck inside for shelter as opposed to enjoying the power of natures fury and not being afraid.

Sex abuse, loss, trauma, and sudden death has the potential to make humans stronger. They have the potential to learn and succeed in the time of need. Yes, I do believe there is a genetic component as well, but it is NOT the majority that rises one from the ashes of life. It is the focus, the desire coming from adversity. As children many of us have fantasized with a whiffle ball and bat. Two strikes, two outs, bottom of the ninth, and Dan Williams is coming up to bat. “There it goes, he got all of that one, it could be, it might be it IS!  A home run, the Cardinals win, the cardinals win.”

The Cardinals not only saw the silver lining the opportunity available they became the silver lining. Seeing opportunity and taking advantage of it for yourself as well as others is walk in life where many benefit. It can be a win-win situation. Look back. What happened in your life to mold you into the person who wants the bat at the bottom of the ninth with two outs and two strikes? Do you know? If so, be thankful and point it out to others. Our path occurs for a reason and all the brambles and trips and falls that came with it just to reach the apex.

Posted in Blog, Life Trauma, Philosophy of Life | Leave a comment

Pillow Rumination

Posted on October 25, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

Fatigued, mentally exhausted, the day has been hell and there is just no time to converse with your loved one or the children. The days have taken their toll in a cumulative fashion. You know that when you lay your head on the pillow and the pillow billows up around your ears that it will only be a matter of moments and you will fall asleep. You stare briefly at the ceiling wondering why the plaster has less spackling in a one inch area. You close your eyes and the plaster in-congruency  attaches  to home improvement which attaches to your savings account which is attached to how much you have recently spent which is attached to working more hours and off you go…… The mind and it’s ability to ruminate to prevent rest is one of the more common complaints by my patents and myself.

Many of us have difficulty turning off the white and grey matter. We cannot seem to stop or slow down the firing of neurons. It may be worry, too much on our work plate of life, ridiculous expectations we place on ourself or any such topic that prevents us from sleeping. Many of my patients want a sleep aid. Ah yes, the immediate benefit of a prescription pharmaceutical. Then there are the OTC sleep aids which ARE all similar. The sleep ingredient is diphenyhydramine (Benadryl.) Natural remedies work minimally, like St.Johns Wart, Valerian Root, and that good ole cup of warm milk. Meditation and visual imagery is my mechanism of choice and has served me well over the years. Like any intervention it does take practice and will not meet your needs immediately.

I recently wrote about the “fourteen second leaf.” The leaf that broke away from a limb about thirty yard in the air. It circled and spiraled, and spiraled some more trying to find it’s predestined respite. I counted one one thousand, two one thousand till it landed fourteen seconds later. During that time I was focused on it’s color, it’s motion, and the dance it did with the wind. It was if there was a marriage between the wind and that leaf. During that time I was not thinking of home improvement nor work nor any stress that would take my mind away from a restful state. That brief moment I was hypnotized. I was with that leaf, a part of it’s descent. We can take this even further and how far can we transcend our minds and become attached in a spiritual sense to objects, to nature to their life and their death? For this topic we do not want to digress, for that would be exactly what we are trying to avoid.

The pillow rumination syndrome, as I call it, can be very destructive. This is not an embellsihment. Lack of sleep is responsible for car accidents, work injuries, marital discord, decreased time with children, a lack of  implementing your quality assets as well as a plethora of medical ailments.

Some of us are wired tighter than others. One must want to try a different intervention if one is to improve. Explore visual imagery. Explore meditation. Explore other avenues besides medication. I rarely guarentee any intervention for it is really up to the individual and their motivation. If one does implement this restful mechanism when that head hits the pillow it WILL work over time. Use that pillow as a lift off, a flight to anywhere, a flight to no where. Make it a one way ticket away from rumination, who knows you may also see the “fourteen second leaf.”

Posted in Blog, How to Find Peace, Philosophy of Life | Leave a comment

Harvest and the gift of Autumn

Posted on October 25, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

For many the Fall brings about many memories. The most profound are clearly the fall colors. The burst of visual stimuli is dependent on the mount of rain the trees receive, the shortening of sunlight decreasing photosynthesis, and the cool weather. The leaves begin to slowly burst into brilliant reds, yellows, orange and brown. Photo enthusiasts abound hoping for the sunlight to catch a ray on a tattered leaf just at the right angle. Some think of the World Series bring about memories of their family and hopes of their favorite team advancing, and yet others hit the apple orchards, the pumpkin patches while a crock of chili and pumpkin bread warm in the oven permeating the smell throughout the house. Fall can bring lovers falling into a bundle of leaves as the crisp leaves resound with their bodies engulfed in the fall gift of natural soft mats.

Appreciation of the seasons, nature and what each person makes of it is up to them. Some of these are harbored into tradition, others are just mesmerized by the love of the change. Seasons give way to an experience that when shared initiates memories and bonds families and loved ones. If it is implemented. We as driven humans MUST stop our cyclical rituals of the a.m. alarm, and the rush to work to climb another rung one by one to achieve that finical dream and stop and look at what is important in your life. Of course you need to work, but where can you cut back to spend time with loved ones?

Harvest, the combines in the midwest, the dodging of deer in rut, and the animals forecasting a cold night by their scurry for food from bird feeders, and nuts that rain down from the trees with resounding thuds. Yes there is that ominous predictive sign of the frigid winter to come but we must stay in the moment, the present to derive the pleasure of the simple.

The seasons of nature are a gift. I cherish each one with a moderate hesitation of the winter. I still try to reframe and find the positive. The chance to write more, and take in the moderate days to capture some photos of snow covered foliage and the brilliance and contrast of the birds against the snow driven backdrop.

I recently wrote post about the importance of the simple, the free gifts of nature that we are exposed to daily but become too busy, too preoccupied to see, to appreciate, to stop and engulf the surroundings that are right in from t of us. This is one simple but yet profound outcome to reach a calmness, an appreciation of why we are here, and why we must give it the time of day in our lives.

This weekend I sat on my deck watching sporadic locust and few cherry tree leaves fall to the ground. It was not one leaf that caught my attention but a small branch with five leaves on either side. Maybe a squirrel gnawed it loose, maybe it was broken in a previous wind storm and was barely hanging. Never the less it came sailing to earth in a circular fall, every so slowly. It fell approximately twenty yards as i counted, one one thousand two one thousand. At fourteen seconds it rested at its new home on the forest floor. Due it’s leaves it caught the air perfectly and took it’s time. In that fourteen second moment I was not at work, I was not concerned about my finances, I was not worried about my children, or the last patient I treated. I was with that leaf. That leaf with it’s predetermined destiny.

For me the Fall is a gift I look forward to. It is natures way of alerting me to its hibernation and the long winter ahead. It alerts me to another layer of leaves, adding another layer of forest floor fertilization and a home for grubs and insects. Look to Autumn for your own peacefulness, your own reflection, and your own muse to reminise on the past and the days when you as a child jumped into the raked bundles of earth tones.

At Peace and Healing we encourage you to explore, to seek out the different, the child like, the want to stay young and the importance to the detail of nature. It is there that many times you will find not only your past but your present. Enjoy your harvest time. Harvest some memories and share them with you children and family, continue the tradition.

Posted in Blog, How to Find Peace, Philosophy of Life | Leave a comment

Keep those Souvenirs

Posted on October 22, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

As a child, my father was a tremendous influence for me. Of course, with his era of growing up and his Marine Corp. background there were the usual, “Boy I thought I told you to put that back where you got it from” and ” If I told you once I told you a thousand times.” There was never any corporal punishment and he was a true mentor in the outdoors. Growing up in the midwest there was not much to focus on besides, hunting , fishing, trapping, and camping. I have left hunting with a gun and now use a Canon, capturing shots of wildlife and enjoy watching them give someone else happiness in the world. I am done taking lives of my relatives. My father though taught me and gave me souvenirs that I now share to my loved ones. Memories are exactly that souvenirs that we hold onto to. Memories must be ruminated on, shared, and ruminated on some more if we are ever going to be able to remember them and share them. Age has a way of stealing those souvenirs and making them a black hole in our cerebral cortex. It starts out with forgetting where you placed the car keys, not once but many times. It then starts to impinge on the short term memory. Many times the long term memory stays intact and is the last to go.

Memories are created by an influx of stimuli that commonly involve one or all of our senses and usually tied in with emotionality at that time. Smells, sight, hearing and touch are all at play when helping mom bake those homemade chocolate chip cookies. Your first kiss may be remembered for a lifetime for it may of been anxiety provoking or very pleasant. We have an unlimited resource to store these unique souvenirs calling on them when we want and at times when we do not want. It is SO important to share these memories with your children and hope they share them with their children. It is in the stories and the showering down of information of our family tree where we gather our perceptions of the past. There is much more at play here then being remembered. It is the tool that connects a child to their hereditary lineage, their connectedness to their Jungian spirituality. Memories are price less and should be shared. If not, they are discarded like a first bouquet of roses to a true love.

When I experience an occasion that is very emotional for me with my children or my fiancee I often ruminate and run it through my brain over and over. For me this helps lock in the memories, and connect them to feelings as well as sensory stimuli. I do not want to forget. I understand the aging process and I realize that at some point those souvenirs will be stolen grey matter to the passage of time. Maybe that is why I write? I can tell you that souvenirs are meant to be cherished. We take photographs, journal away on our lap tops, and even video record. The stories of the past though are rarely shared. Our past is filled with scars, happiness, tears and anger. We choose what we want to share. Please share some of your memories from time to time. You will not regret that you did and that bit of sharing is giving back to someone you love.

Posted in Blog, Relationships | Leave a comment

All Christians listen to the Firefighter.

Posted on October 5, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

As the end of August neared many Americans were aware of the upcoming anniversary. The one that froze our country and united our country. Amazing how time waters down a death, a tragedy, a trauma. As a sex abuse survivor I know how tragedies can get watered down over time. There were many tributes this year for the firefighters of 911. Television, radio, and newspapers aligned and did an awesome job in remembering the true courage of firefighters and what they went through on 911. National Public Radio (NPR) did a great interview with Capt Haskill and Capt. Jonas who survived the collapse of the towers. I listened intently. Emotions were close to the surface as the description of what he went through tapped into all of my senses. The noise, the screams, the shaking of the floor as the building began to collapse  and the smells of burning buildings and bodies. Capt. Haskill lost two brothers in the 911 tragedy and went on to state that many New York firefighters had family members working within the fire department. It was not only a family defined by employment but literally in many situations, a genetic family.

NPR asked why he felt offended or upset when he was told, “God watched over you and saved you from this tragedy.” The Capt. replied, “Yes, I think that comes across as arrogant, especially when so many good people lost their lives. How do you think that makes other family members feel when they hear a comment like that.” I applauded while driving, I literally took my hands of the wheel for a second and applauded his courage. He was not only courageous in the sense of dealing with a tragedy but was courageous in not wavering with his values. This is NOT about believing in God or not, this is about being sensitive to others when making ( God being involved comments regarding someone’s life when others also died.) I truly believe others make these comments out of knee jerk reactions, they are used to making this comment and do not realize the fallout. I highly doubt there is forethought prior to the comment. At least I hope not.

Showing love and empathy is not implemented by touting a predetermined destiny of sorts to a survivor when he lost two brothers. The implication, whether or not recognized is; your other brothers were not saved by God, and the others were meant to die. The bottom line is we do not know when we will die. If you want to believe the hand of God will summon you based on finding grace, being born again, or through prayer, so be it. That does not mean you should make statements that clearly come across as “arrogant.” If you cannot see these statements as arrogant or how they can be perceived as arrogant, than that my reader is even more concerning from a psychopathology standpoint.

Capt. Haskill and Capt. Jonas are amazing men. I have the utmost respect for them to not waver from their conviction during a national media interview. They have saved others, and they saved themselves. As for divine intervention, should that not be left for the divine to make? Should we as humans make such judgments? How can we as humans make a definitive statement of being saved by a divine intervention when we do not really know? Is that statement for the survivor or more for the comfort of the one making the statement? These questions MUST be looked at for the tension and embarrassment will continue and will create even more of a divide. Allow others their belief. Recognize their anguish. Recognize their emotional pain. If you want to tout your God, your belief ask what their belief is, and ask what they would like or what they feel they need. That my friend is called RESPECT. In all state funded hospice associations one is NOT allowed to push, tout, describe or educate they dying on religion or one’s belief unless the dying person wants that. There is an enormous amount of respect to the dying patient. Is that not what a divine entity would want?

The 911 firefighters, are an amazing group. All of us can learn from their courage, and all of us can learn the meaning of integrity from this story. This is not about God, Muhammad, Wanka Tanka, Buddha or any other one entity. This is about appropriate compassion and respect of a traumatized individual that lost two brothers in a national tragedy. This is about showing courageous values and integrity. All of us can learn from those that have suffered. Wisdom is obtained through time, and tragedies. As the snow becomes to cover your own roof top, I hope we can all feel true empathy and comfort others with respect. In Peace and Healing.

Posted in Blog, Religion | 1 Comment

Children and crutches.

Posted on October 1, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

What is your muse? (These old crutches)

Above my desk in my office hangs two matching, worn, wooden crutches. These crutches are children’s crutches from the early 1900′s. They are worn, but still in rather decent shape. They are one of my many muses, that inspire, that motivate and push me forward in my field. Visual reminders, sensory stimuli that motivate or even ground us to a connectedness with all living creatures as well as our own memories can be a muse for our passion. I personally want to have the reminders. I look at them, touch them and I am reminded that some child had to use these to ambulate around. Rituals, mementos, and photographs have been used for centuries as grounding tools for becoming closer with a power much greater than our own. I personally believe all old remnants have an energy about them all their own. There must be a leap of faith here. I am not referring to anything metaphysical although it may come across that way. I am referring to an inner very real emotions that rise to the surface when we are reminded of pain, love, suffering, and healing.

Photographs jog our memory of loved ones and times gone bye. We may cry, laugh, or get choked up. Never the less, those emotions are real, inspired by very real memories that were triggered by very real objects. We can minimize these feelings, throw away all the reminders, however the reaction will occur again at another time in our life. To ignore these emotions, these feeling that are triggered by stimuli is like ignoring the effects of the sun on our skin during a warm July summer. We know it is hot, but there is no escaping the burn you will incur if one lays out too long.

We use crosses, the star of David, a crucifix, feathers, statues and the like to inspire and help us reflect on the purpose of why we are at a certain place and what we need to do. For myself my muse can be an oak tree, a sunrise, a flower, or a leaping white tailed deer, and yes, even an old pair of crutches.

I often wondered who used them? How severely was the child injured? Were they used more than once?  They are a reminder of why I do what I do as well as the goal is to treat and help those injured to obtain a healthier physical path.

A simple antiquity of crutches for six dollars proved to be invaluable for myself, my memory and my inspiration. They will hang on the wall till I find someone else to appreciate them. That is the goal of many of my small icons. I eventually give them away. It is in Native American tradition to give away what is meaningful to you to someone that will gain something from it. It may be tomorrow and it may be next year. Find your muse, find your icon and then pass it on. Tell the story of how you came about it and revel in the fact that you are paying forward a memory of the past.

At some point in life we all need a crutch, a little help, a little support. It may be figuratively or it may be metaphorically. It is okay to ask for some help, and it is more than okay to reach out and help someone else. In peace and healing.

Posted in Blog, Medicine, Philosophy of Life | Leave a comment

The hunt for Altruism

Posted on September 30, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

Priorities and altruism, a moral conundrum.

Living in the country as a child my dreams of wants came across the black and white Zenith, the back of cereal boxes and the adds in comic books. I did save my money from cutting grass and working for my father to buy the coolest, remote control tank I ever saw. I want this and I want that. When I get a job I want a four wheel drive pick up truck with large tires. The carrot in the shape of George Washington. The majority of children, teenagers and even adults have blinders on, unable to view the other side. Not necessarily the side of poverty, the side of the less fortunate but the other side of one’s heart, the soul of giving back. That part of the human being when we light up like a candle’s flame on a new moon night. When we give a gift to a loved one. That part of us where we want to see someone else happy. Not fulfilling some ego extension of a need we did not fulfill as a child.

It appears to not be fostered enough as well as the mainstream media grabbing us with their claws of life. Have we not heard statements like, “I want an I-phone.” “I have to have that car,” “I must have those shoes.” Have you ever heard any of the following? ” I have to give back to that poor family.” Can I give my Christmas presents to this kid in my class, he rarely has anything?” ” I must give more money to a charity.” ” I spend so much money on foolish items, I want to surprise someone who does not have as much.” I heard these statements a few times. Very few. Only once a year my fiancee and I do some random surprise giving back. this is the first I have written about it, for I think it is counterproductive to write about altruism. By writing about it or touting it by strict definition it is NOT altruistic. Then there is the double edged sword that I have encountered where giving is met with feelings of offensive perception and individuals perceive that they are a charity case. My point here is a question, “Why do we as humans, rarely focus and give back on a regular or irregular basis?” Thank goodness there are these Christian holidays, for if they did not exist the gift of giving may fade away with the next version of the I-phone.

Parents must start changing this ingrained cycle of “I want”, and that “want” which is fulfilled with the success of capitalistic endeavors. Yes, we all have choice. Yes, we all should be rewarded for our hard work. How much is enough? How many CD’s and DVD’s do we need? How much do we need to store in our small bird cages that we come home to? Can we give back on a regular basis? Can one teach their children the importance of wanting to give, and the happiness that is found in that giving back? Yes. The media and commercials are a hard road block when trying to climb that altruistic ladder. No one should be forced to give. A human being should in my opinion be able to assess the need that is out there and be able to give a little bit back. I have folded up a five dollar bill, a ten dollar bill and laid it on a desk in a clinic to see if someone would pick it up. If it is gone, so be it. Then that person needed it more than I. I an not rich by any stretch of imagination. In fact I am in debt due to some life experiences I chose. My path, my life, and I have never been happier. It makes me very happy knowing I can still do my surprise, greenback tossing’s from time to time. Money and trade have always been at the root of greed. My neighbor has a better and bigger shovel. It lasts longer than my wooden one. I have to have one. That wood splitting wedge is more functional than mine I need one. yes ingenuity and advances bring us better toys, however can we not give some of those toys back to others? It intrigues me to observe the young and watch how the eight year olds are giving and as they age they slowly become more and more selfish. Combine that with selfish, arrogant, parents and you have a monster on your hands.

I dream that some day, children will obtain their wants but more importantly they will have an intrinsic need to give back. To not think of “the self’” but to think outside of the self.

As Mark Twain stated, “ Any so called material thing that you want is merely a symbol; you want it not for itself, but because it will content your spirit for the moment”

Is this not  true in this day and age? Humans, that species that cannot fill up their soul enough with how they want to perceive themselves or how they want others to perceive them. From hair products, to clothes, to electronics. The cars we drive, to the illusion these items keep us alive. Happiness and self satisfaction has been measured. There are studies that show an increase in endorphin’s when the act of donating to a charity or to a major tragedy occurs. Sadly in a few days time mellows out the shock value and the trauma. We fall back into routine and the giving slows. Wouldn’t it be nice if the routine we fell back into was a giving routine, a routine of love, a routine of making others happy. Altruism is within us. You do need a hunting license just a mirror. It is in you already, just give a little back and watch yourself smile as another is warmed with your generosity.

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Power to the people. Really?

Posted on September 25, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

Authority, over control, and expression of freedom.

Stories have inundated this author about the over control of authority figures since my black and white Zenith telecast-ed the sixties, “hippies” and protests of  atrocities towards other humans. Freedom of speech,freedom to rally peacefully, freedom to express our views and the freedom of others to criticize back. Intelligent discussion. Then we have enjoyment of music, concerts, public speaking events etc. The young inherently complain about police officers, the authority figures, and Freudian psychologists and other therapists will go on and on about this life cycle and how we all go through it. Some feel it is harbored in an expression of acting out towards our parents, others a growth process and reistance to change.

During the Labor Day weekend my family enjoys the moderate sized fair in southern Illinois. We take in a concert or two, ingest good tasting food that probably contributes to some coronary artery blockage, laugh, play games and eat some more. This tradition has been going on for fifty-four years. I have seen at a minimum over sixty events. Some of the acts were Bob Hope, REO Speedwagon, Styx and others. This year we saw Willie Nelson and Lynyrd Skynyrd. At concerts there may be some hint of cannabis, a few citizens reaching the alcohol content of a freshman in college and maybe even a fight. This author saw none of that. What we did witness is something I have never seen at the fair or any concert in my fifty-four years walking my concert path. State of Illinois troopers escorting with one hand, two hands and forcibly guiding patrons to their seat for taking a photograph. These concert goers on average were in their forties and fifties, male and female wanting to take a picture. They would walk down a few stairs stand for two to three seconds and, “snap.” Smart phones and digital cameras contained the majority of these dangerous, threatening antics. The bands did not have a request for no pictures, I checked. I also spoke to a few state troopers asking about the perceived over control of authority and where this command came from. Of course they stated the fair management, ( I doubt this.) It was not all state troopers, but enough where I could not enjoy the musicians. One gentleman had to have been in his late sixties at the Willie Nelson concert, he asked if one of troopers could move over a bit or just sit down so he could see. No response walked away and crossed his arms. I tried to walk up, crouch down at the stage so I would not be in the way of anyone and take one picture. “One picture.” I was not spoken to, or tapped on the shoulder. I was slapped on the shoulder and directed to sit in my seat.

This bizarre act of power and control is the exact reason there has been a large increase in anti-authority and loss of control in crowds. I was contemplating that it would  only take a few drunk patrons, some abusive language and over zealous cop and we have a full scale riot. Fear of authority or was the authority fearful of not knowing how to handle a peaceful crowd?

Yesterday in New York City on Wall street another over control, over zealous response to peaceful demonstrators occurred. I watched as many videos as I could find to get an objective view on this pepper spraying, insecure, short penis syndrome officers’ response. I did not see any protesters, throwing rocks, striking out before they were pepper sprayed. Of course the report on the news states, they would not move from blocking a walkway. I have included a video of two women being maced who were standing and NOT striking out. Please watch closely. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anoE_OT6iro

This is the behavior that only exacerbates conflict, and continues stereotypes of the the good police officers, the kind, the one’s that want peaceful control. It is the stereotypes,the sweeping generalizations that will continue to barricade harmony and not allow power to the people in a peaceful manner. In the last three years I have witnessed first hand abuse of authority in the workplace, by state troopers, and other police in uniform. This abuse is not targeted at minorities, it is targeted at all of us. So what is the goal? If it is to induce fear, it might in a few. I am afraid knowing the human condition that those in authority will be getting a huge surprise down the historical path. The best predictor of future events are the past events. Look at American history, look at World history. When this behavior continued in the past at the pace and severity it is occurring now there has always been dire responses.

Peace and Healing….hmmmm. Where is the peace? Where is the healing? When a citizen cannot have freedom of expression, freedom to rally peacefully, then where is the democracy? The human condition for harmony is not in a can of mace, or escorted by a slap on the shoulder to not take a picture of Willie Nelson. It is in introspection of one’s soul. What intrinsic need is lacking in these officers? Are they feeling that vulnerable? Are they feeling that frightened that they need to over control, over react? Fear makes way for anger, and anger makes way for irrational behavior. I can only hope that as humans we can come together despite our differences. The conservative and the liberal, the religious and non-religious, the atheist and the believers. Peace is achievable but not before everyone of us looks inside at our own demons, FIRST. When one is at peace with themselves then they can give peace back. We can imagine as John Lennon would say, but imagine just does not cut it. We must start showing it in behavior, that means those in authority also.

Posted in Blog, How to Find Peace | Leave a comment

Unethical Cardiologist teaches clinician importance of patient care.

Posted on September 22, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

In life our path guides us directly and indirectly smack dab into the path of others. We meet individuals we may enjoy their company, form a relationship, not form one, learn from them or even learn to avoid them. We form relationships and find out that the individuals we thought they were just do not meet our expectations of morality and ethical behavior or they are just so angry and hostile as well as selfish we do not want to be around them. We may get hurt, become guarded and hopefully learn.

On September 21st at a hospital in middle America I brought the love of my life into the emergency department for an evaluation of chest pain, fluttering of her heart, and shortness of breath. Nursing, physician, and staff were above excellence. She needed to be admitted for observation as well as further testing. Peace and Healing has been dedicated from the beginning to ferret out atrocities in health care which includes mental health care. The following is my story as it happened from my Nike tennis shoes.

It should be noted I have been practicing medicine for thirty years as a physician assistant and yes, I still am trying to get it down. I also carry that doctorate of psychology degree. I tell you this, as it is important in the realm of experience. The degree is worthless, except for insurance reimbursement and allowing myself to place my hands on thousand of ill patients in trying to figure out what their ailment is. Anxiety running  high, and concerns over the worse possible outcome is always in the back of our mind. We try to calm our partner and for myself…well I need to observe and make sure nothing slips through the intravenous line of medical care. More deaths, more morbidity occurs in hospital stays than out of hospitals. We go there for treatment however, understaffed facilities with over admitted patients leads to error, more often than not. Yes there is much good that occurs, however I am one that prepares for the worse and hopes for the best. The iatrogenic injury or illness falls to the hands of the provider. As providers we must be responsible for our mishaps. That means owning up and being responsible. Mistakes will happen, we are not immortal, although some clinicians might believe they are or at least try to give that aura.

She was admitted. The cardiologist appeared at the bedside. She stopped, stood about two feet from the bed where her patient was waiting, I was standing on the opposite side. Importance? I was taught to go to the head of the bed, shake hands, make eye contact, engage the patient (you know show caring behavior.) She began to discuss that she was not impressed with the findings but would recommend proceeding with further testing. Two options: 1. Angiogram. A catheter is place in the thigh (inguinal area) and dye is injected so the coronary arteries that feed the heart muscle can be visualized. Some risk, one percent sudden death, and a higher risk of puncturing a vein. 2. Cat Scan angiography. Similar test, dye injected but through the vein in the arm, less risk with a good yield or outcome. I asked what would you do if this was your sister? She replied, ” I would do the CT angiography, it is the lesser risk test for her age.” Excellent we will put our trust in you. Test to be scheduled tomorrow. Approximately, sixteen blood sticks later, interrupted sleep, worry, holding each other, and being saturated with HGTV we awoke to a nurses voice. There has been a change of plans. Your doctor wants to do the angiogram. “Why?” I said quickly with concern.  All her labs have been normal, she is stable, and there are no problems that I was aware of. ” She is changing the test because there is no one here to read the CT angiography.” the nurse replied quickly. “Let me understand this, I queried. The doctor who stated the other procedure which is more invasive, more of a risk is going to be done as per her advice because of a personnel issue?” “Yes, It seems so,” she stated.

This could not be true. A car accident occurs in slow motion to the senses and the words were becoming garbled as the nurse spoke. I looked at my best friend laying in the hospital bed and her face begged for me to have the answer or at least change the words the nurse spoke. I felt helpless, but would NOT allow this to happen. I have witnessed many atrocities in medical care but this was one was right up there. Did this physician really believe we were going to say, “sure go for it, anything you want you are the physician.” We ended finally seeing this physician later in the evening. She never showed her face, ONCE the entire day despite our request. We bantered, I called her out and stated that what she did was unethical, she side stepped the statement and did not address it. As for my best friend, she got the less invasive test with a good outcome, and further distrust of physicians.

To health care providers who are reading this blog. Touch your patient, a handshake, a gently hand on the shoulder, remember they are most likely scared of the unknown. Talk to your patients not as if you are teaching an academic class of first year students in anatomy. Three, do the right thing. My best friend and love of my life should of been transferred to another hospital if they did not have the radiologist there to read the test, not just do the higher risk test. Is that too hard to assess doctor?

I make mistakes. I have long days and I get tired and edgy. Yes, it is a high stressed job the field of medicine, however that NEVER excuses blatant unethical behavior. As a consumer one MUST  ask questions. Ask questions till you are satisfied with understanding what is happening. Providers can speak in medical jargon and loose you quickly. Trust is established through time, and good outcomes. If you have a good clinician be thankful, if not keep looking. I learned from this interaction or should I say I just remembered how it feels to be on the other side. The next day I went to work and I can assure you I never left the room till all the patients questions were answered.

Thank you cardiologist in middle America. Thank you for showing me that I am walking an ethical, caring path !

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Bachmann overdrives campaign into medicine and mental health.

Posted on September 17, 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

Michele Bachmann once again engages mouth before brain to verbalize not only inaccuracies but an outrageous non-factual lie. This behavior must be brought to the forefront by all of us, as it directly impacts all of our own peace and healing. Individuals MUST be held accountable by the public and the medical community for making such statements. Her statement;

“I will tell you that I had a mother last night come up to me here in Tampa, Florida after the debate. She told me that her little daughter took that vaccine, that injection, and she suffered from mental retardation thereafter. The mother was crying what she came up to me last night. I didn’t know who she was before the debate. This is the very real concern and people have to draw their own conclusions.”

The vaccine she is referring to is Gardasil, the vaccine that young women may obtain to safe guard against the precursor to cervical cancer. There have been over thirty five million vaccines administered and no effects or findings of any mental retardation, or mental health effects. The precursor to cervical cancer is (HPV) human papillomavirus.

It is statements made with this off the cuff attitude by political figures that frightens Peace and Healing. Michele Bachmann’s passion for right wing, conservative issues foregoes scientific data as well as the genuine benefit for others. Bachmann has frequently walked thin ice with inappropriate, inaccurate statements about homosexuality, gay marriage and now venturing into medicine and mental health. A few Bioethicists have offered up to ten thousand dollars in reward money for proof that this alleged little girl suffered mental retardation from Gardasil. Peace and Healing would like to join this crusade, as Peace and Healing will also offer one thousand dollars for any evidence that Gardasil causes mental disability. Peace and Healing will donate the money (should we receive it) to the American Cancer Association.

Peace and Healing rarely ventures into the political arena. We are dedicated to dispel myths and rumors as well as atrocities in medicine. This, my fellow reader IS an atrocity. All individuals must have accountability in life, especially public figures. Why public figures? They have the arena, the attention, and many times a devout following. It takes very little time these days to research the facts with credible evidence. This statement rings of impulsive dramatics, with no concern for accuracy. As citizens, consumers, parents and human beings we must hold  irresponsible behavior by the extreme, miss guided  accountable.

Bachmann has concern over a vaccine because she believes it will promote sexual promiscuity. This is the real issue of the right, extremist who are against this vaccine. If the vaccine could prevent any other cancer unrelated to sexual intercourse it would be touted as the best intervention since aspirin. When speaking for your passion just speak the truth. One can never go wrong when they speak from their heart. When one wants to drive home the point with embellished lies, exaggerations about the facts then there is no integrity.

Bachmann could come clean. Imagine that, a politician admitting they were wrong, paying up and donating the money that has been wagered to a charity she chooses. THAT is how one role models to our children. Admit error, show humility and move on. Do not hold your breath, for you might need to be resuscitated.

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