Comments for Peace and Healing

Comment on Emotional Abuse by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C. — Fri, 03 Feb 2012 17:03:42 +0000

Congratulations on your new healthy and happy path. I am sorry for what your children experienced. Hope there are some life lessons there. He sounds like a narcissistic personality disorder.

Comment on Emotional Abuse by Dyan

Dyan — Fri, 03 Feb 2012 16:24:40 +0000

So so true. When my husband and I had little dealings wuth his disfunctional family (geographically) he was a different person. During the times we were closer to his family our life was directly affected by the constant family drama that involved all 4 (one has passed away from abuse) children that constantly revolved in and out of the parents lives (they being the enablers). My husband had been emotionally and verbally abusive until I discovered his affair with another married woman and others in the past. I threw him out; he is now living in adultry with this person, and seems quite proud of it. His teenage daughters are appalled and devistated at his choices, but agree the house is alot more peaceful now. He has filed for divorce, stating “he had not been happy in years” despite a very successful career, children, home and a loving (too tolerent) wife that looks better than she did on the wedding day. Go figure.

Comment on All Christians listen to the Firefighter. by Ana Ponce

Ana Ponce — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 07:05:43 +0000

I have an acquaintance that I have known for 7 years who continually had outbursts of anger, lacked empathy, was hurtful to many and always the victim ( always everybodys else fault) being a spiritual person I did not want to hate him for hurting me so many times so I set out to understand what causes/caused him to be this way. I learned he is a narcissist and had an absent father who lived in the same city and never acknowledged/ cared about him. I now realize this lack of love deformed him and in reality although he hurts others a lot – he hurts himself much more by living a tortured existence and unable to find peace and someone to love. Thks 4 ur great insight.

Comment on Unethical Cardiologist teaches clinician importance of patient care. by David Panther PA-C

David Panther PA-C — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 14:12:35 +0000

Dan-Appreciated your piece on the art of patient interaction and your unfortunate experience. I am a PA in a Cardiology practice where the physicians are compensated by productivity and am trying to resolve ethically my participation in the system. It is becoming increasingly difficult after 35 years as a PA to work in a health care delivery system imbued in the free market. The issues are many and will not be reconciled before I leave this planet but finding your article on the web was both informative and gave me a bit of solace.

Comment on Altrurism by Marcia

Marcia — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 21:15:46 +0000

Read a few of the papers you gave me, fascinated by the one on altruism, made me want to start writing again.
On Altruism
I would agree that it doesn’t really exist, as a part of our human nature. If someone was to ask me why I did any act of kindness for another, I would have to say it was for one of, perhaps, three reasons. One of those reasons would be that someone, a friend, child, acquaintance, relative, co-worker, had a need I could fulfill, not necessarily because I wanted to, but because everyone deserves help, or kindness, or just “time,” once in a while. It amazes me that so few people can really rely on any one to be there for them, in their time of need, whatever that need might be. But, providing that need isn’t altruistic, it’s simply “walking a mile in their shoes,” and deciding to make the walk, for their sake, somewhat easier.
Another reason for helping others is part of the “pay it forward” idea. I was blessed to have a wonderful step-father, although he wasn’t part of my life until I was an adult. He was generous and kind and the most patient person I will ever meet. I take care of my mother for him, for what he gave to me and for what he went through just living with her for 30 years. Caring for her is my tribute to him. Again, not altruism.
Reason three combines my strong sense of responsibility, for upholding what it is I believe in, (in other words, ethics, integrity–I will never use the word morals) with part of that belief system being my faith in God and my appreciation for everything He has given me. Faith in God, to me, doesn’t mean attending a specific church every week, something I could never do. I’ve studied many “religions,” throughout my lifetime, embrace ideas from many of them, but specifically can say that I do believe God is Energy and Spirit, found in every living thing, and what we, as humans, do with this energy determines the quantity and quality of God’s Spirit we possess. I do, also, believe in a spirit of evil, which can consume any one if they choose to allow it, thus we have cruelty, avarice, greed, hatred, genocide, all of the end products of evil, as part of this world we exist in.
Only the fullness of God, impossible for humans to possess because of our free will and propensity to stray from what is good and what is love, is truly altruistic. We can strive for that end but, realistically, it’s impossible to attain. Perhaps it’s our striving that brings joy to God’s Spirit and, therefore, to our own.

Comment on Racism 2011 by Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C.

Dan Williams, Psy.D.,P.A.-C. — Sat, 06 Aug 2011 15:37:06 +0000

Thank you Bill. I really appreciate the response. Call me naive, hopeful and grandiose but I am still shocked that this continues. My hopes will remain high and we must role model to others the importance that we are all one, and we are all connected. In Peace my friend.

Comment on Racism 2011 by Bill Rogers

Bill Rogers — Sat, 06 Aug 2011 03:18:01 +0000

Amen! These administrators should be stripped of their positions as they are a poor role model for Kymberly, her classmates, and for every student that attends the school they work for and the community they live in. ‘When’ they eventually need Kymberly to be working in a position where she can assist their life, or just be working to pay into their social security and precious pensions they should be rejected as she was.
But you are correct Dan, Justice will be served in due time and not by Kymberly. She has already risen above them and will continue to do so. Justice will come from their Maker.
God bless, Kymberly. Sincerely, Bill (a sixty something white man)

Comment on Love by Betty

Betty — Thu, 03 Feb 2011 19:59:43 +0000

Interesting post, Dan.. My past experiences with “romantic love” have proven to me that as long as one is still dealing with the emotional damage from their past, attempting to enter into a long term relationship is ill advised. I, unconsciously, would choose a partner that exemplified the personality I needed at the time, in order to work out the specific issues that were surfacing at that time. Of course, at the time, I had no idea of what was going on, it was only after I’d been in therapy for a time, that I came to understand the workings of the unconscious mind. A bit late for the two unsuccessful marriages… My first husband was passive, my mother image, that did not protect me from my abuser…..My second husband was controlling and intense, my father image…my abuser.. So, I now know in retrospect, that they really were doomed from the onset. However, they were successful, in that, I did confront my demons, unfortunately, it was at the expense of two husbands. Just thought I’d pass this on to others, that they might take a look at “why” they choose the types of partners they do….and hopefully might have a ” lightbulb” moment from it !!